She just wanted to feel wanted. He just wanted to prove he was a man.

Society has this way of configuring our minds to its ways, if we let it.  

All of her college girlfriends said, “If you love him you’ve got to show it.” All of his guys said, “You’re gay, man, lame if you don’t smash. “

She snuck into his room, using his roommate’s key hoping he’d be impressed by her brave effort. Most girls wouldn’t approach him like this. Waiting for him to come home, she laid across his bed. This would be her first time. The worst time. She’d give him the go, a greenlight, she should’ve definitely said no.

We succumb to these temptations because we believe everybody’s doing it. Who said these “new norms” are right?

He was on the baseball team, fine and all the girls liked him. Dormant symptoms running through his body, STD yep, she didn’t know it.

She was cute but not the prettiest girl, the glow up type. In a few years she’d be bad, they all knew it.

Pressure.

She fell into the trap and got burned.  Lucky for, her it was the “curable kind”. Yet, the internal damage on her heart and soul took more time to heal. It was a spiritual pain antibodies couldn’t kill. At least I’m not pregnant she thought. She felt lucky she had a shame she could hide.  A blow to her self- esteem, she took each day in stride. Life was taking her down, if self -love was the goal she needed more time. Time to heal, revitalize, forgive herself and him. It’s hard to do all of this fighting alone.

How did she get to the place she was in? Looking back it all started with a simple conversation.

He said, “sex me if you love me.”  She rolled this conversation around in her heart and mind for months until it became an action. That action ruined a year of her life. It wasn’t worth it.

Lets talk?

Why do we believe physical intimacy is the best way to bond ? Sex does not equate to love. A very small percent of people have sex before marriage, on the first date, ect. and it works out for them ! Yet, for a MAJORITY, this is not true. These numerous failed relationships just add to their body count. Heartbreak upon heartbreak builds up inside, leaving them cold and bitter.

Frivolous sex in movies is glorified BUT they never show the true stories of how damaging sex outside of a trusting marriage can be?

Why don’t we get to know each other anymore? People know more anatomy than psychology and its killing their success in love.

STOP IT.

Song of Solomon says: Don't awaken love before its time.

You are worth a happy, healthy, and good relationship.

You deserve someone getting to know your heart and mind.

You deserve being more than a one night stand another notch on his/her belt.

You deserve for someone to love you and date you the right way.

You owe it to yourself to stop seeking pleasure all of the time but to allow something real to happen to you.

You are capable of waiting.

You are Gods prized possession.

You don’t have to give sex to get love. You don’t need a person to make you feel like you belong.

This holiday treat yourself like the gift you are. Find value in the fact that the bible tells us

In Psalms 139:17 How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them!

The father wants you to know he didn’t die for a “nobody” he died for a “somebody”. He is thinking about you constantly with good and loving thoughts. You are so special to him. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done or how many times you messed up his blood covers your sin. Receive his forgiveness!

Pick yourself up and dust yourself off. His plans for you are still amazing and hopeful.

You don’t have to give sex for love…

All the love you need is available to you for free. It’s in Jesus.  At the right time, he will send the right one and sex will be the icing on the cake to a wonderful relationship with secure foundations built on trust and love.

Happy Holidays!

<3

Gab